Embers to Flames
by Tessa

June 2000
Rating: PG13 to NC17

+++++++++

Part two

Starbuck snapped awake, momentarily confused and disoriented. "Where am I? He thought. Suddenly memories of Athena flooded his senses. Her scent. Her touch. Holding her. Loving her. Starbuck smiled and turned to the spot next to him where she should have been only to find the bed empty. Sitting up, Starbuck glanced towards the refresher. The light was out. "Thee," he whispered into the darkness. No response. Glancing around, Starbuck noticed a muted glow coming from the doorway to the main room.

Slipping out of the bed, Starbuck looked around for something to wear. His uniform lay strewn across the floor. He did not really ant to put it on, but he did not like the idea of parading around Athena's naked either. As his eyes adjusted to the lack of light, Starbuck spotted a robe draped across the chair. He picked it up and smiled to himself. It was his. He'd given it to Athena just after they'd made love for the first time - more that six yahrens ago now. He couldn't believe she still had it. Her scent clung to it, which meant she not only had it but that she wore it regularly. Starbuck put it on, tying the frayed belt around his waist.

Quietly Galactica's most famous warrior padded into the main room. A single candle illuminated Athena as she sat on the sofa wearing a faded shirt that reached to her knees. The front said Caprica Academy. Starbuck knew what the back said. He didn't have to see it. It was Zac's academy jersey. Athena always liked to collect bits of clothes from the people she loved. He'd helped her sort through Zac's things. He's seen her take it. He just couldn't figure out why she was wearing it or what she was doing. Glancing at the timepiece on the wall, he realized they'd only been asleep for a few centons.

Athena was absorbed in a book on her lap. Starbuck recognized it as her scrapbook. Every major event in her life was recorded there with likenesses and mementos. She did not hear him enter the room. For several minutes Starbuck just watched her. Her slender figure seemed lost in the large shirt. Her knees were tucked under her and she looked for all the colonies like the little girl he'd first met so many yarhens ago. Her hair was pulled out of her face into a haphazard ponytail.

"Thee?" Starbuck whispered, not wanting to startle her. She glanced up at him and he could see tears on her face. " I woke up and you weren't there. You okay?" Athena nodded, biting her lip and wiping the tears absently from her cheeks. She had not even realized that they were there.

Starbuck crossed the room and sat next to her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. She buried her head in his shoulder for a long moment, and then looked up at him. "Starbuck, how did we get here?"

Starbuck grinned and shook his head. "Honey, if you don't remember I am definitely losing my touch."

Despite herself, Athena smiled and shook her head. "I don't mean us. I mean all of us. You. Me. Father. Boxey. Apollo. Especially Apollo. How did we come so far without healing? Without dealing with any of this?"

Starbuck looked down and saw the pages she was staring at included a photo of her mother and Zac.

"Your brother would probably say I brought us to this." Starbuck's voice broke. As angry as he had been at Apollo earlier, he was equally as afraid that his friend was right. Zac's blood was on his hands. He'd said as much to Cassie. How could Athena ever forgive him for that?

"NO!" Athena jerked out of his embrace and forced him to look at her. "Never say that! Zac died doing what he wanted to do - what he loved. He would have found a way to be out there Starbuck. It's not your fault. It was never your fault. If anything, it was mine."

"Yours? Athena, you're the best eyes we have on that bridge, but there's nothing you could have done for Zac. I can't imagine what it must have been like for you to hear . . . to see . . " Starbuck stopped, unable to put into words the horror he had imagined her going through. If only he had been there for her. If only . . .

"I asked him to take your patrol." Athena whispered, unable to look at Starbuck.

"What?" Starbuck stared at her, perplexed and confused.

"He wanted Apollo to switch with him. He wanted to fly with you. I asked him to take your spot instead. I thought we could celebrate the armistice together."

"He wanted to fly with me?"

"You were his hero, Starbuck. More than Apollo. More than Dad or Cain. You had time for him. For both of us. Apollo was always too busy." Athena looked away, her voice quivering. "I asked him to take your patrol then spent yahrens grateful it wasn't you out there. What kind of sister am I?"

"Oh Thee," Starbuck pulled her back into his arms. "You said it yourself. He would have gone anyway. He wanted to go. He needed to go. I just wish I had been out there with him - with them. Maybe …" Starbuck buried his face in her hair, unable to continue.

"Apollo was there. As bad as it was for us, it's worse for him. He left Zac and he has to live with that every micron of every day. He had no choice, but he still has to live with it. And I just made it worse."

Starbuck looked at Athena, more confused then ever, "You? How? The last time I saw your brother he made it clear that he blames me for Zac's death and for ruining your life."

"When I saw him, I said you weren't the one who abandoned Zac." Athena's voice sounded small and far way.

"Oh Thee." Starbuck was horrified at what his fight with Apollo had done to her. She'd gone to her brother to defend him and he knew her words damaged her far more than they had hurt Apollo. "This can't go on. I love you. I've always loved you, but if its going to cost you this much …."

"Stop" Athena covered his mouth with her hands. "Not another word, Captain. You are my life. My soul. I have not felt complete since the day you walked away from me after the Destruction. The one cost I can't bear is the cost of losing you - not again. I just got you back after being stupid enough to throw you away."

" Athena, you weren't the stupid one. I was the one who pressured you. Who only thought about myself. Who wanted comfort and found a warm body. I abandoned you. I used Cassie. How can you blame yourself?" Starbuck stared at her incredulously.

"You came to me seeking comfort and wanting to give the only comfort you could - your love. I wanted to wallow. To let everything be taken away so I could pity myself. So others could pity me. I turned you away Starbuck. Then I acted like a jealous baby when you found comfort elsewhere."

"Athena - do you realize what we've done? We've spent four yahrens blaming ourselves. We've been so sure that the other one could never forgive us that we've never given us a chance."

"You were with Cassie. Starbuck. You had Dalton. There was no chance."

"Athena, after the fire - before and after Dalton - I knew what I wanted. I only stayed with Cassie because I thought I could never be with you - that you would never forgive me. I could not stand to be alone."

"Poor Cassie," Athena breathed, meaning it more than she ever had. "Does she know?"

"She's always known. She was the one who finally forced me to admit it to myself. At first she was doing the same thing - looking for comfort and a way out. She'd lost Cain. She knew her way of life - her career - was over. I was her ticket out. She never expected to fall in love." Starbuck shook his head, still amazed at the mess he'd made of his life - their lives.

"And Dalton?"

"I thought for a while - maybe - that Cassie had gotten pregnant on purpose. She may have. I'll never ask because it doesn't matter. I love my daughter, but even when I knew Cassie was pregnant, I could never see myself sealed to her. When I didn't ask then, she knew. We both knew. We kept pretending, but we knew." Starbuck took a deep breath. "Remember when you came to see her in life center and held Dalton?" Athena nodded. "For just a micron, I wanted her to be yours - ours. Cassie saw that. She's lived with it for three yahrens. Ultimately she loved me enough and respected you enough to set me free."

Athena sat silently in Starbucks embrace. She could not imagine seeing the man she loved - seeing Starbuck - wish that her child belonged to another woman. "Cassie is a lot stronger than I gave her credit for, Starbuck. And a lot more generous."

"She knows there is only one person for me - one person I want to make my wife." Athena stared at him - unable to believe what she had just heard. Without speaking, she moved into his arms.

For a long moment, Starbuck just held her. Finally, He looked down into her beautiful eyes and kissed her. The kiss held a promise far beyond the moment - a promise of a million kisses over millions of microns. A promise of forever - of children, of love, of safety.

Breathless, Athena locked eyes with Starbuck and saw that he felt it too. Wordlessly, he lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bedroom.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

The following morning, Starbuck woke to the sound of the refresher. Smiling he set up in bed and waited, Athena came into the bedroom. Her eyes glowed as she smiled back at him. Wordlessly, he stretched his hand out to her. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Athena melted against him as he kissed her. After several microns, he released her and she pulled back to stare at him. "What?" he asked, unable to take the smile off his face.

"When you leave here, how long until the entire fleet knows you spent the night?"

"How long does it take an IFB reporter to file a story" Starbuck asked, thinking that he might never leave anyway.

"Exactly. We have to talk to my father . . . and Apollo."

"Your father I agree with, sweetling. I have a question I want to ask him anyway. But if we tell Apollo he'll ground us and probably kill me."

"He is going to find out. Regardless of what he has bottled up inside of him he cannot run my life. It's his issue. He has to deal with it."

"You're ready to slay the monster this morning, aren't you?"

"I'll do anything that I have to do to make this work. Say it again Starbuck."

"I love you and I want you to be my wife - now and always."

"I love you Starbuck - now and always."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Less than a centon later, Athena stood in her father's quarters. The commander looked at his daughter - she fairly glowed with happiness. He suspected that he knew the cause, but he also intended to speak with her about the situation between Starbuck and Apollo. Word of the fight had reached him, but when he broached the subject with his son the younger man was uncharacteristically curt. Adama hoped his daughter would be more helpful.

"Okay, what is it that is so important that it requires my attention before I've eaten."

"Its about Starbuck father - and me."

"I supposed as much. I know about Apollo's actions regarding the recons and about the fight. I think perhaps a mediation is in order. Whatever the personal issues here, it should not influence professional situations."

"I agree father, but there is more to it." Athena took a deep breath. "Starbuck spent the night in my quarters last night."

"Young lady, no father should ever need to know that - no matter what the circumstances."

"Yes sir, but . . . well maybe he should explain"

Athena hit the panel by the door and motioned a visibly nervous Starbuck into the room.

Seeing Adam, he quickly stood at attention.

Adama eyed the warrior, one of his favorite people and as much family as anyone aboard the Galactica - his children included. "Captain," Adama boomed in his best command voice. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Sir," Starbuck squeaked.

"In the last secton, Captain, you have fought with my son and seduced my daughter - what do you have to say about it?"

"Father!" Athena shrieked, horrified.

Adama silenced her with a look and fixed a steely gaze on Starbuck. The Captain gulped then squared his shoulders and returned the commander's stare. "Sir, I can't apologize for hitting Apollo. I am sorry we came to blows, but I will not allow anyone to say what he did about my daughter or yours and not answer for it. As for seducing you daughter sir, I did nothing of the kind. I made love to the woman I love and intend to be sealed to - that is if you will give your permission."

Adama continued to glare at Starbuck - secretly pleased that the warrior refused to back down to either him or his son. After several microns, the commander spoke. "And what does the mother of your child have to say about this, Captain?"

"Cassiopeia knows I love your daughter, sir. She ended our relationship so I could be with Athena. I believe she will support our marriage."

"I see. Captain Athena?" Adama bellowed. His daughter sprang to attention next to Starbuck. "Do you love Captain Starbuck?"

"Yes Sir!"

"And if I refuse to give you permission to take the seal?"

"I'll resign sir and petition every ordained official in this fleet until I find someone to perform the ceremony."

"I suspected as much. I just have one question for the two of you. What took so long?"

"Sir?" Athena asked, thoroughly confused. This was not going like she had planned.

"Athena, for well over twenty yahrens I have watched you moon over Starbuck. I watched him sweep you off your feet and fall in love with you. For the last four yahrens I watched the two of you do this crazy dance that no one understood. What I don't get is why it's taken so long."

"Well, sir," Starbuck said, realizing that the Commander's earlier blustering had been an act. "Your daughter is pretty stubborn."

"Starbuck!"

"That she is, Captain. Takes after her father in that respect. Thankfully her heart and her beauty come from her mother." Adam strode forward and embraced his daughter, kissing her gently on the top of her head. "Be happy, Athena."

Athena returned her father's embrace. "I will sir," she replied, tears in her eyes.

Adama moved towards Starbuck. "Starbuck, I have always considered you a son. I am proud to have you marry my daughter. May the Lords of Kobol bless you both." The commander embraced Starbuck, his own eyes moist.

When Adama released him Starbuck took Athena's hand. "Sir, there is one more thing."

"And that is, Captain?" Adama asked.

"Sir, with all due respect, what do we do about Apollo?"

Adama glanced from his daughter to his future son in law and shook his head. "Quite frankly Starbuck I have no idea.

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