Title: At The World's End Part 3
Author: Athena13
Copyright (c) 1998-99
Rating: PG-13 

Disclaimer: This is a fiction story based on the series Battlestar 
Galactica and its characters created and owned by Glen A. Larson.  This 
story is not being sold for profit and no infringement of any copyright 
rights are intended.  All unrecognized characters and plot lines are 
mine and any resemblance to any person living or dead is purely 
coincidental.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CHAPTER 5 - Choices

Athena found herself standing in Milliways, one of the restaurants on 
the Rising Star. Her face grimaced at the sight. This trip down memory 
lane might not be so interesting after all. Who knows what she might 
get to witness here.

"It's not the past," Zac leaned over to tell her. 

Athena shot him a look, not even bothering to say out loud that she 
hated it when he read her mind. She was suddenly beginning to feel like 
a character in a story she'd heard as a child. "Don't tell me, the 
present?"

Zac smiled.

"Who in the world would be at the Rising Star right now that I would be 
interested in?" Athena asked.

"Just pay attention," Zac pointed to two women arriving. One of whom 
she recognized.

"Cassiopeia? I'm supposed to care what she's doing right now?" Athena 
was thoroughly confused. "And who is her friend?"

"Porta, she's a biologist on the science ship. She and Cassi met during 
the outbreak of that virus on the Galactica and became friends," Zac 
explained.

Athena didn't want to know how he knew everything. She also didn't 
really want to know what Cassiopeia was going to say to her friend. 
Watching Zac with "Zac" didn't feel as intrusive. 

Of course, if this was just a dream what was the harm? 

"Thank you," Porta smiled and batted her eyelashes as the host handed 
her and Cassi their menus. The young man nodded and walked away.

"Nice try," Cassi smiled down at her open menu. "I think he's used to 
women trying their wiles on him."

Porta just shrugged and flipped her long gold hair over her shoulder. 
"One must stay in practice," she said as she opened her menu and 
crossed her bare legs.

Cassi looked up from her menu. "I can't believe you're a scientist."

Porta put her menu down and leaned forward. "Just because one uses 
their brains for a living doesn't mean they die from the waist down. 
I'm still a woman. What I can't believe is that you used to be a 
socialator. I mean, the change is sort of radical," Porta pointed out 
Cassi's rather conservative clothes.

"It was a different life. I want different things now and I can get 
them," Cassi told her.

"And Starbuck? How does the warrior playboy work into those plans?" 
Porta lifted her menu up again.

"Once he settles down with me he won't stay out all night or take on 
all those dangerous missions," Cassi closed her menu, having made her 
choice.

At the signal their server appeared and began to take their orders.

"She can't be serious! Starbuck stop playing pyramid or just hanging 
out, not taking dangerous missions!" Athena said to Zac in an outraged 
voice. 

Once the server departed Porta sat back. "Why choose Starbuck then if 
you want to change him?" she asked her friend.

"Exactly!" Athena seconded the question.

"He saved me when everything happened. Not from Gemon, but he brought 
me to the Galactica. After Cain I never thought I would want to be with 
another warrior, no matter how many perks he could give me or how 
convenient, but I care about him. He seems amenable to change. I'm 
pretty sure he's not dating anyone else anymore," Cassi attempted to 
explain.

"So you admit you want to change him?" Porta uncrossed and recrossed 
her legs under the table.

"I can show him the right way to live," Cassi told her friend.

"He's good in bed I take it?" Porta sipped the Ambrosa a server had 
surreptitiously brought over off during their conversation.

"W-e-l-l," Cassi smiled. "And I would know."

"So why no warrior?" Porta asked.

"They could die. It's hard to always wonder if it will be the last 
time. After this latest mission I don't even know if I can do it 
anymore," Cassi whispered.

"So that's the real reason you want to change him. Do you want him to 
give up being a warrior?"

"It's who he is, I wouldn't change that, but I don't know if I can 
spend to rest of my life this way," Cassi admitted.

"So you've talked about getting sealed?" Porta put her glass down in 
shock.

"Actually, we've talked about _not_ getting sealed, but it's a start," 
Cassi smiled.

"I think you're being delusional Cassi, but if anyone could pull it off 
it would be you," Porta poured herself another glass of Ambrosa. "And 
living on the Galactica must be almost as nice as living on the Science 
Ship in this Fleet. Or the Rising Star for that matter. Maybe I can 
give you a few pointers on your mission?"

"Well," Cassi said slowly. "It certainly can't hurt to pool our 
resources."

Before Athena could process what she had just heard she found herself 
standing outside. Literally. On the edge of a forest that she didn't 
recognize on some planet she didn't recognize.

"Uh Zac, what is going on?" Athena looked around apprehensively. For 
some reason this place gave her the creeps.

"This is the planet you crashed landed on, the one where Baltar will 
be dropped off," he deigned to answer.

"What about the distortions? Are there Cylons here? Would we be handing 
him back?" Athena asked one question after another.

"Things have been taken care of. Or will be from your perspective. This 
is the perfect place for Baltar," Zac said the name with disgust.

Athena crossed her arms and looked down at her feet. This was some 
strange dream. Starbuck saying he loved her? Cassi conspiring to change 
Starbuck? If she didn't know better she would think she had some 
unresolved issues in that department. But she did know better. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of landing vipers. She 
looked up and saw her friends and brother getting out of their vipers. 
She looked over towards where they were looking and for the first time 
noticed her own viper - what was left of it - and herself laying on the 
ground unconscious. It was rather unnerving to see herself. Maybe this 
was an out-of-body experience?

She was pleased to see that Bojay was the first out of his ship as he 
rushed to be by her side. Apollo, Starbuck and Boomer were next. From 
her position she couldn't see their expressions and she walked over to 
them. She stood behind Bojay as he tried to wake her up. She looked 
over at her brother and saw the anguish in his face as he looked at 
her.

Her breath caught in her throat. Somehow she had never imagined her, 
her being would affect him so much. She knew he loved her, he was her 
brother, but seeing the effect her state was having on him was a 
revelation. Tears ran down her face as she tried to prompt "herself" to 
wake up for him. His over-protectiveness suddenly became dear to her 
rather than a nuisance.

She had to smile, though, as she saw Sheba behind him trying to give 
him silent comfort. 

Then she looked at Starbuck.

Her breath caught in her throat and she physically backed away. He was 
looking at her. Not the her on the ground but the her standing there 
watching them. 'But he can't see me!' she looked around for "Zac" for 
confirmation. She couldn't find him and looked back at Starbuck 
fearfully.

His face was immobile and placid, as if he was a mere bystander hanging 
around to supervise the operation. It was a bit out of character, she 
had to admit, usually he threw himself into whatever he was doing 
wholeheartedly. 

"Maybe he doesn't care?" she said out loud. Maybe he wasn't looking at 
her, but just away from the her on the ground.

Unable to stop herself she walked closer so she could study his face. 
She kneeled down, careful not to "touch" Bojay or Boomer, although she 
wasn't sure she could, and watched. She ignored the ramblings that she 
was saying to Apollo now that "she" had awakened.

Starbuck's blue eyes had turned a smoky shade, almost gray. A sure sign 
that his inner emotions weren't as calm as he made it appear. Before 
she could discern what he was feeling he got up and walked away. She 
stood and watched him walk back to his viper.  His back was stiff and 
his hands were clenched into fists.

Without volition Athena followed him. 

Suddenly he stopped walking and turned, watching Apollo carry "her" to 
his viper, hers clearly beyond repair. Then Starbuck turned and watched 
Boomer sift through the wreckage looking for clues as to what caused 
the crash.

'He must think I did something stupid,' Athena realized. 

She could remember clearly losing control of her viper and the terror 
as she began to free fall before everything went black. She knew she 
didn't cause the systems failure. There had been nothing on her 
scanners and then suddenly...something appeared. Something that seemed 
to shock her scanners with its appearance causing a chain reaction 
along all her systems that she couldn't stop no matter what she tried. 
She knew those engineering specs better than her own name by now, in 
the centons before complete failure the only thing she could get 
working was one of the emergency signals before that too failed. She 
guessed now that Starbuck had received it.

'He'll never fly with me again,' she thought with a sinking in the pit 
of her stomach as she watched him turn away and put his hand on his 
viper. 

Starbuck stroked his machine for a few microns before grasping the 
ladder and climbing in.

'Maybe it's for the best,' Athena turned and walked back to where she 
had left "Zac."

She stood waiting as she watched the vipers take off and rise above the 
atmosphere. Once they were out of sight, "Zac" appeared again.

"Come," he motioned and began to lead her through the woods. 

After they had walked for a while they came upon a small clearing where 
the setting sun sent its weak rays through the trees. The vision of the 
rays of light striking leaves and flowers through the tree trunks was 
breathtaking. But it was obviously not what she was meant to see.

Sitting in the middle of the clearing was a metal box with a 
transmitter pointing to the heavens above it. She walked closer and 
tried to find a way to open the box and look inside. She had never seen 
anything like this before. The box stood about a half meter tall and 
was completely square.

She ran her hands around it looking for a seam or a removable panel. 
Nothing, it was completely smooth. The only way in had to be from where 
the transmitter sat on top. She felt underneath the transmitter looking 
for some way to remove it. She could feel heat rising from the box's 
surface, but there was no other indication that it was currently 
working. The fact that her brother and the others had found her made it 
seem that it wasn't.

She couldn't get the transmitter off. She even tried lying on her back 
and kicking it, oblivious to "Zac's" amused expression.

She flopped back down on the ground in frustration. "What is this 
thing? Who put it here?" she asked.

"It's a signal that can no longer be read by your people. It's a 
message whose frequency now only damages your vipers and other ships. 
It's not enabled now and the Fleet will be able to pass by this planet 
safely and Baltar can be left here," Zac stuck a hand in her face which 
she took as he helped her get up.

"Won't they want to investigate the distortions I encountered first? 
And this message, is it important to our search?" Athena asked as she 
brushed leaves and dirt off her uniform.

"It could be, perhaps it can be retrieved from your viper memory banks 
if they were not completely destroyed. As for investigating, they do 
not have the time and luxury for such investigations. No one would 
approve such delays for Baltar's safety. There are no more distortions 
and this is the only suitable planet in this solar system," Zac 
informed her.

"I suppose you're right. They're just going to think I screwed up 
royally on my first mission," her shoulders drooped.

"There is evidence that Boomer found of a systems failure not 
attributable to you. They will assume it was a fault in the viper. 
Perhaps Apollo and Adama will believe it was something else, but it 
won't effect your squadron status," he comforted her.

"Except Starbuck won't fly with me anymore I bet. Which is probably a 
relief anyway," she shrugged and turned away.

Zac shook his head as he saw the dejection in Athena's shoulders 
belying her words. She still did not seem to understand.

"Come, we have on more stop," he told her before the forest was bathed 
in a glare of white light.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Athena suddenly found herself standing outside the Life Center. 

Literally found herself, that is.

Another Athena stood trembling outside the Life Center. 

"Zac, what's going on?" Athena asked in a worried voice, afraid she was 
about to witness the death of someone close to her. "If...," she 
couldn't say the words, but there was no way she was watching if that 
was the case. She'd figure out someway to get out of there.

"Relax," Zac put a hand on her shoulder. "It's nothing like that."

Athena took a trembling breath and nodded. 

The other Athena closed her eyes and tears began to fall down her 
cheek. She leaned up against the wall and doubled over, as if she was 
in great pain. After almost a centon she wiped away her tears and 
straightened herself up, a determined look coming across her face.

"I didn't know I looked like that when I made that face," the visiting 
Athena whispered to her "brother," who didn't bother to respond, but 
just took her hand and they followed the future Athena down the 
corridor.

She stopped when she reached her brother Apollo's quarters. Hesitantly 
she pressed the button for the door chime. After a few microns Sheba 
appeared at the door. 

Sheba looked at tear-streaked Athena and immediately put her arm around 
her and led her into the room. 

"Yes, Sheba and Apollo are sealed," Zac informed her as he and his 
Athena followed them inside.

Sheba sat the still silent Athena on the couch and went to fetch her a 
drink. "Drink this," she returned and passed the cup to her sister.

The Athena on the couch looked at the contents of the cup and laughed. 
At Sheba's confused expression she placed the cup on the table and held 
out her palms. They were still shaking.

"Athena," Sheba sat down beside her. "What's wrong? Is this about 
Bojay?"

"This is not how I ever pictured this moment, that I can tell you," 
Athena shook her head, not addressing the question posed to her. "Not 
even close," she stood up and began to pace in front of Sheba. 

"I always imagined that this moment would be filled with pure joy. I 
had imagined since I was a little girl that I would be waiting at home 
with a special meal and flames sitting with a tiny smile of my face. My 
husband would enter and see my face and he would know. Then he would 
sweep me into his arms and tell me how happy he was. And we would be 
happy together. No, this is not what I imagined at all," Athena stopped 
walking and looked down at herself, tears coursing down her face again.

Sheba stood up and started to walk towards the stricken woman, but 
pulled back a few steps away. "Athena?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, I'm going to have a baby. I'm going to have _his_ baby," Athena 
looked up and confirmed. "This wasn't how it was supposed to be."

"Oh Athena," Sheba rushed forward and took Athena into her arms.

The visiting Athena grabbed her "brother's" arm, wondering what in 
Hades was going on. Who's baby was she having. And why wasn't she happy 
about it.

Sheba stood stroking Athena's back and trying to quiet her down. 
"Athena, you need to calm down, I'm not, come sit down, please," Sheba 
coaxed her sister.

Athena nodded and took a deep breath. "It's silly of me to cry, it's 
not the worst thing in the universe, but it just wasn't supposed to be 
like this."

"Athena, it'll be all right. You won't be alone. Please sit down," 
Sheba asked her again.

Athena gave her brother's wife a crooked smile and sat down. "Oh, I'll 
be alone all right. This wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this," she 
repeated. Athena looked up at her sister. "Not with him."

"Athena, is the baby's Bojay's?" she asked in a hesitant voice.

Athena closed her eyes for a few microns before answering. "No, it 
should be, but it's not."

Sheba placed a hand over the hands clasped in Athena's lap. "Whose baby 
is it?"

Athena looked up at her friend. "It's Starbuck's."

Sheba's jaw dropped open as she stared at Athena in shock.

"Shocking isn't it," Athena nodded. 

"How? When?" Sheba asked in a strangled whisper.

Tears began to flow down her cheeks again. "After," Athena stopped to 
catch her breath. "After Bo died, after the ceremony I went to the 
Celestial Dome to be alone. To think. I was probably there for centars. 
I'm not really sure. Starbuck found me. I think he was looking for me 
for a while. He seemed worried," Athena shrugged.

Athena's grip of Zac's arm tightened at the revelation of Bojay's 
death. But she couldn't turn her head away from the story unfolding 
before them.

Sheba bit her lip, obviously wanting to ask questions.

"He wanted me to go back to Father's or my quarters, but I wouldn't go. 
I didn't want anyone to find me, I just wanted to be alone!" Athena 
said angrily, he hands clenching into fists under Sheba's comforting 
touch.

"He wouldn't leave! He wouldn't go away! He insisted on staying with me 
until I left. How could I be alone when he's there?" Athena asked her 
friend. "I was so angry at him. Starbuck didn't let me be angry with 
him. He never did, even when I was a kid, he never let me be angry with 
him," Athena shook her head, a slight smile at the memory on her face.

"Is that when...," Sheba trailed off.

"Not exactly. He sat down next to me, he didn't touch me. He just sat 
there silently like he always does when I'm upset or angry with him. 
The damn thing is that it always works. He calmly sits down close to me 
and I just can't stay angry at him. So we sat there. He didn't try to 
talk to me or touch me. He just let me cry or not as I wanted to. He 
just stayed and watched me," Athena finished quietly.

Sheba raised her eyebrows.

"Yeah well, I know sitting next to me doesn't make babies," Athena 
laughed and ducked her head, a blush staining her cheeks. "After a 
while I stopped crying and I stopped thinking. Well, I guess that's 
obvious," Athena sighed.

"Did he? Did you?" Sheba asked uncertainly.

"I don't know Sheba. I really don't know. We were just sitting there 
looking at the stars. I reached up and pointed to a cluster of stars, I 
looked over at him and it just happened. It sounds lame, believe me, I 
know. I've gone over it in my mind a thousand, a million times, neither 
of us made the first move. We didn't even say anything. We just made 
love," Athena closed her eyes. "Bojay had just died and I was making 
love with Starbuck."

Sheba looked away, a strange expression on her face.

"I know he was your best friend Sheba, and your wingmate. I never 
intended to betray him like this," Athena put her hand on Sheba's arm.

"Oh Athena. That's not what I was thinking. Bojay is gone. I know you 
cared about him a great deal, I know how devastated you were, are. I 
don't doubt that. I just don't know what to say, what to do. I'm not 
sure I really understand. About you and Starbuck, I mean," Sheba placed 
her hand over Athena's as she spoke.

"Me and Starbuck. What is there to understand," Athena shrugged. "In 
two days he's getting sealed to Cassi and I'm having his baby. It's all 
pretty simple. Starbuck and Cassi will hate me. Everyone else will be 
disappointed or disgusted, or both, with me."

"Have you told him?" Sheba asked.

"No. I don't know if I will. I'm not sure if there's any reason for 
anyone to ever know it's not Bojay's. I just had to tell someone, I," 
Athena jumped up. "I shouldn't have come to you. You're Cassi's friend 
too. I'm sorry," Athena began to head for the door.

"No!" Sheba jumped up. "You should have come to me. You're not thinking 
clearly."

"I'm having his baby Sheba. I have a piece of him inside me. We've 
created something so precious together Sheba. And if I tell him he'll 
hate me and maybe his child," Athena said without turning around.

"He would never hate his child. He couldn't hate you for this," Sheba 
told her. "He's not an innocent bystander in this. You created this 
baby together."

"And he's marrying the woman he loves in two days," Athena turned 
around. 

Sheba looked at her silently. 

Suddenly Athena found herself in the hallway outside Sheba's quarters 
with "Zac."

"Wait! What happens? What do I decide?" Athena asked.

"It doesn't matter," Zac shook his head. "What will happen will 
happen."

"Then tell me something that is important - how did, does, he die?" 
Athena demanded.

"That knowledge is not mine to give. It is not something you can 
prevent. Not directly," Zac answered her in a grave voice.

"I can't let him die!" Athena exclaimed.

"You have choices to make Athena, only the choices you make can change 
the path of the future," he said enigmatically.

"What does that mean? What choice can I make to prevent his death?"

"You cannot prevent his death, everyone dies," Zac answered.

"But that death, so young, you said I had choices, what choices could 
prevent him from dying so soon?" Athena pleaded with her "brother."

"Follow your heart Athena. You must follow your heart," Zac told her 
gently.

Athena shook her head. "I don't know what that means. What does that 
mean?" she demanded angrily.

"You know what that means, you just refuse to understand. You do not 
follow your heart. Your heart speaks and you do not listen. Just like 
you are not listening now," Zac told her.

"That's not true!" she insisted.

"If you don't follow your heart Athena, then call it your instincts, if 
that word makes you feel better, then you will make the wrong choices," 
he explained.

"I don't, when don't I follow my heart?" Athena reined in her anger 
with obvious effort.

"You must think about your life Athena. You must discover where you 
have not followed your heart. You must learn from your wrong choices. 
That is what living is about. And if you don't live you are dead."

"Bojay dies because I didn't follow my heart, instincts? What about the 
baby?" Athena asked.

Suddenly the was a bright light and everything disappeared.

END CHAPTER 5
Athena13@geocities.com