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I know you loved him baby celebrate who he was.
I know you've got to go on and live your life.
Go down to the river of the spirit that runs through you,
and lay yourself down in the healing waters.
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Chapter 7 - Healing
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Athena stood at the window in what would, in a couple of cycles, become Noah's room. Her arms were crossed across her chest as if she was trying to give herself a comforting hug. Her thoughts flitted between positive thoughts, such as how glad she was that Noah would have a window in his room, to how frightened she was at this almost impetuous undertaking.

Could she handle being a mother? Just a yahren ago she could barely commit to the man she had loved almost longer than she could remember. Now she was going to commit her life to a little boy. Her moods and feelings were not something that she could take the luxury of nursing. A little boy could not be expected to understand the need for space that people had from time to time. She was taking on a never ending responsibility. It wasn't like a job that she could leave after a couple of cycles. Was she up for this?

'Perhaps Cassi was partly right,' she thought with a quirky smile. 'I am adopting a little Starbuck!' A little boy was only marginally more demanding than that warrior.

With a hollow laugh she dropped her arms and rolled her head back. She had to get these feelings under control before the evening cycle. Instinctively she knew that Noah needed her to project certainty and security. She was, after all, the adult here. She chalked up another ironic realization. Athena would no longer be the "little sister" or "aunt" but the responsible parent.

"Now that's a scary notion," Athena told the empty room, silently completing her mental dissection. Before she could begin to put herself back together, however, the door announcer rang out.

"Come in," she called out. "It's unlocked." She turned and walked back into the main room just in time to catch sight of her brother entering. "Hey Apollo, Boxey asleep I take it?"

"He fell asleep almost as soon as we came back from dinner. He's not used to staying up so late and he probably won't ask to come to dinner again soon. Sometimes giving in is the best way to teach a child why you tell them to do something. I don't think it was quite as exciting as he had imagined. I'm sure you'll learn that for yourself soon enough," Apollo said with a bemused smile. "So another few cycles, huh? How are you doing?"

"What if I can't do this?" Athena asked her brother in a pained whisper.

"I thought you might be feeling this way," Apollo's smile faded and he nodded in acknowledgment of her expression of fear. "It wasn't too long ago that I stood where you did and it's my turn to return the favor and tell you that you're going to be a great parent and to remind you that you're not alone," Apollo gathered his sister into his embrace and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Athena sighed as her brother's faith in her began to drain away her fears. "Thanks," she mumbled into his shoulder.

"My pleasure," Apollo said as he continued to stroke her back. "I owed you one anyway."

"For what?" Athena looked up at her brother curiously.

"For talking to Boxey about Sheba," Apollo reminded her. "So is there anything else you want to talk about?"

"Not really," Athena reluctantly pulled out her brother's embrace. "But what did you have in mind?" Apollo had just opened his mouth to speak when the door chime rang again.

"Saved by the chime," Athena practically danced away from her brother. "That's probably Sheba. Come in," she called out. "Hi...," Athena trailed off as she recognized that her visitor was _not_ her future sister.

"Hi Starbuck, we were just about to talk about you," Apollo smirked and crossed his arms.

"Can I come in?" Starbuck looked expectantly at his friends.

"Sure," Athena glared at her brother and stepped away from the doorway so that Starbuck could enter.

"How was dinner with Chameleon, I mean your father?" Apollo asked as Starbuck took a seat on the couch-bed.

Athena's expression changed as she remembered the reason for Starbuck's absence at the family dinner that past cycle and she too looked at him curiously.

"You can call him Chameleon, I do. It seems a bit too late, or too soon, I'm not sure which, to call him 'Daddy'," Starbuck told them with a wry grin. "It was pretty great actually. He told me a lot about his...our family and my mother Orali. I don't think I've been this drained after a night cycle of pyramid, though," Starbuck ran a tired hand across his brow. Neither sibling could miss the glow in his blue eyes as he mentioned the heretofore unknown name of his mother.

Her own worries forgotten, Athena sat down next to him on the couch, took his hand between her own and pulled it into her lap. "Have you forgiven him for lying to you?" she asked quietly.

"Yes," Starbuck opened his eyes and looked at her. "I can't say I agree with his justifications, but we've agreed to put it behind us."

"Have you forgiven Cassi?" Apollo suddenly asked, reminding the pair that he was still in the room.

"Chameleon tried to explain away her part in all this, but....," Starbuck paused for at least a centon before gathering his thoughts. "I don;'t know if I can forgive her. She knew how much he meant to me and she kept it from me for sectars! I might never have...," Starbuck's hand tightened around Athena's hands and his face stiffened as he tried to suppress the pain and anger that was obvious to his oldest friends.. "It doesn't matter. She and I are over and we're _both_ getting on with our lives," he finished with a forced lightness.

Athena dropped Starbuck's hand back into his own lap and looked away. "Why don't we have something to drink? I'll go get something," she said hurriedly and left the room before either man could respond.

"Whoa," Apollo breathed as his sister flew out of the room.

"I think she doesn't want to discuss my love life," Starbuck observed almost humorously..

"Can't say I blame her...but I promised to stay out of this. However, I didn't agree I would chaperone. You're on your own here!" Apollo stood up and headed for the door.

"Must be a family thing," Starbuck remarked as Apollo practically sprinted for the door. "Please."

One word from his best friend was all it took to slow Apollo's steps.

"You know she'll kick me out if you're not here," Starbuck said almost too low for Apollo to hear.

But Apollo did hear his best friend's words and he silently turned back around and resumed his seat.

Starbuck, uncomfortable with his show of emotion, settled for communicating his gratitude with his deep blue eyes.

"So how did dinner really go?" Apollo cleared his throat and changed the subject.

"Strange. No magical appearances of the Lords of Kobol or anything, just a nice dinner with a man. I'd always imagined that somehow things would be...more...than they were," Starbuck tried to explain, but it was clear that words fell short of what he wanted to express. "But it felt right, like we belonged there together drinking ambrosa and discussing pyramid. I know it seems shallow, but it was...right."

Starbuck shook his head as he tried to put it all into perspective. "Hearing about my mother and about myself as a young kid was more than I had dreamed it would be though. I wish I could remember being a part of the stories he told me, but I just can't remember anything before running in the forest at Umbra. He doesn't have any pictures of my mother, but Chameleon says that I look a lot like her."

"What was she like?" Apollo asked.

"Intelligent and beautiful, that I can believe, she is _my_ mother," Starbuck quipped.

Apollo rolled his eyes.

"She was the daughter of a farmer and she and Chameleon grew up together. Apparently he was a merchant-trader in the community. He tells me he didn't start gambling and conning until after he lost us and his memory," Starbuck continued.

"But all that must be in the genes somewhere," Apollo remarked with a small smile.

"Can't argue with that," Starbuck said as he thought back to the stories Chameleon had told him over their long meal. "Do you think she's coming back?"

"Your mother?" Apollo said, startled.

"No," Starbuck laughed. "Your sister. She's been gone a bit longer than it would take to get us drinks."

"She lives here now, she has to return sometime," Apollo shrugged, he knew his sister probably wanted a few minutes to compose herself following the conversation they had been having when Starbuck surprised her. "So, uh..."

"Yeah," Starbuck understood his friend's unasked question. "I haven't changed my mind. You haven't changed yours have you?"

"No," Apollo assured him he still supported Starbuck's feelings for Athena.

"Have you and Sheba set a date yet?" Starbuck asked.

"Probably sooner rather than later. Boxey, thanks to my sister, is now excited about Sheba coming to live with us. In fact, he's now demanding a sibling. Preferably a brother," Apollo chuckled.

"Are you going to have more kids?" Starbuck looked intrigued by the idea.

"I'd be lying if I said the thought hadn't occurred to me, but Sheba and I haven't really discussed it yet. She'd have to give up flying, for a while anyway. Though, if it were up to me she'd give up permanently," Apollo confessed.

While Apollo was speaking, Athena returned.

"We thought you had gotten lost," Apollo commented as she placed a decanter of Ambrosa and three cups onto the table.

"I raided Father's stash," Athena confessed, ignoring her brother's not unexpected revelations about Sheba's flight status. "I thought we should celebrate, a little more."

"What are we celebrating? Not that I'm arguing with the sentiment?" Starbuck asked as he took over the honors and poured them all a measure of the altered liquid.

"Apollo's engagement, you finding your father and me becoming a mother," Athena smiled. "If all that doesn't deserve a celebration, we at least deserve a drink!"

"Can't argue with that," Starbuck passed out the cups.

"Here's to our new lives," Athena raised her glass, her eyes studiously avoiding Starbuck's meaningful look.

"To new beginnings," Starbuck said softly before he took a sip of his drink.

"To friendship," Apollo hid his smile behind the rim of his cup as he felt the mantle of guilt lift as his sister and best friend seemed unable to resist staring at each other.

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"How does Jack figure into all this?" Apollo asked a centar later from his seat on the floor.

"Into what?" Athena looked at her brother, clearly surprised at the turn in conversation.

"The adoption, Noah," Apollo elaborated, asking the question that Starbuck longed to ask.

"Jack and I are no longer involved romantically, so basically nothing," Athena shrugged and took another sip of ambrosa, avoiding the gazes of the warriors sitting across from her.

"I'm sorry," Apollo said quietly.

"Don't be. Actually, there's been a rather interesting development regarding who he is involved with romantically," Athena said mysteriously.

"He's already involved with someone else?" Starbuck exclaimed censoriously.

Athena and Apollo paused in their conversation and gave Starbuck identical questioning looks. No words were needed to express their message - look who was talking!

Starbuck cleared his throat and motioned for them to continue their conversation.

Athena and Apollo shared a smile.

"Why would it be interesting?" Apollo asked.

"Rhys," Athena revealed. "Obviously they know each other professionally. She joined us for dinner on the Rising Star a couple of days ago and it just happened. Finally I might add."

"Wow," Apollo breathed sharply before all three of them fell into a companionable silence during which they recounted their memories of Rhys and Zac.

"Are you all right with this?" Apollo broke the silence some centons later.

Athena shrugged and developed a sudden interest in the contents of her cup. Though she hadn't told Apollo, Athena had to assume that Starbuck had told him just why she really was all right with this unexpected development. After Starbuck's own "revelation" a few cycles ago, however, it didn't seem like an intelligent idea to use that truth to reassure her brother. Not when she couldn't trust it.

"We had just started dating, it was too soon to be hurt," she said lamely, instead of explaining that she was still in love with Starbuck and no other man could really hurt her.

Starbuck, however, seemed to know what was on the tip of her tongue and stared at her unrelentingly, clearly daring her to expose herself before her brother.

Athena just flushed and looked away.

"It's not like we had been together for sectars or anything. So how are you doing Starbuck?" Athena threw the conversation into his court.

"I just toasted to new beginnings, Athena," Starbuck continued to stare into her eyes unrelentingly. "How do you think I'm doing?"

"And speaking of new beginnings, the new day has already begun and I have a big one ahead of me," Athena jumped up and began to clear away their debris, not so subtly dismissing her guests.

Taking the hint Apollo and Starbuck began to stand up, but not before they shared a meaningful look between them.

"Good cycle, Sis," Apollo leaned over and planted a kiss on his sister's averted cheek.

"You too," Athena fairly squeaked as she tried to sweep her guests out of her quarters.

"Don't try too hard," Apollo whispered along with a quiet goodbye to Starbuck before slipping out of the room.

Athena stopped what she was doing as soon as she heard the door close. She knew that Starbuck had remained behind, but she refused to look up at him. Or rather, her body refused to look at him and she wasn't so sure that her heart wasn't going to explode in her chest. All of this was something she had dreamed about for so long, but after all that had gone between them she couldn't believe it was sincere. She refused to endure another broken heart courtesy of Starbuck and yet she could never banish him from her life completely. Or, apparently, her quarters at that micron.

"Look at me," Starbuck ordered quietly.

Athena, against her better judgment, looked up.

The look in her eyes was not what Starbuck had expected. Instead of anger or hesitation, Starbuck saw a look of vulnerability that he never thought Athena-the-commander's-daughter would show him. His stomach dropped as he admitted that he wasn't sure whether this meant she was opening her heart to him or a signal that things between them were truly over and she would never trust him again.

"Give me a chance," Starbuck asked in a whisper.

"How many chances do you get Starbuck? I've lost count as to how many I've already given you," Athena said angrily, all signs of vulnerability suddenly closed off from his view.

"Just one more," Starbuck stood his ground.

"It's late, I'm tired and I really don't want to think about this," Athena told him almost pleading with him to let her be. "Right now," she amended when Starbuck refused to move.

"Good cycle Athena. You're going to be a wonderful mother to Noah," Starbuck said gently as he pressed a chaste kiss against her cheek before she could move away. "And to our children," he added before slipping out the door.

Athena closed her eyes as she willed his presence to dissipate from her quarters.

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Athena could hardly keep her seat in the shuttle. Just a few more centons and she would arrive at the Orphan Ship to take Noah home. A wry smile flitted across her face as the oddity of the situation occurred to her.

She wasn't sealed. She hadn't given birth. And "home" was a hunk of metal flying through space. Sitting quietly at her feet was a mechanical daggit and next to her sat her adopted nephew. This definitely wasn't the situation she had imagined as she was growing up.

Absently, her hand rest on the back of her nephew's neck. No matter how odd, she realized, she couldn't have asked for more. Despite her cognizance of the twists and turns life had taken and the tears that had been shed, never in her life had she felt so full of love. Odd or not, she loved her nephew with all her heart and his mechanical shadow was a member of her family, she loved her family and friends and her work. And now her family would be growing by one precious member. The only things missing for her were her mother's presence and that of her dear brother Zac.

Her mother had always taught her to do what made her happy. It was a bit of wisdom that she had clung to over the past few sectons as she headed for this fateful moment. Without too much preening, Athena couldn't help but feel proud that she had survived the trauma and pain of the last yahren and arrived to where she had taken control of her destiny. And she was doing something that made her happy.

Not too long ago despair was her constant companion. The loss of her mother, Zac, her world and eventually Starbuck had left her bereft and lost. Finally, she had taken control of herself and the world around her. Finally, she felt that there really was something concrete to look forward to. Without disrespect to her father, the dreams of Earth still seemed to be a distant fantasy without substance and not providing any real comfort. She had come to realize that she needed to do something now, before that distant future arrived. Or didn't. Now she felt that no matter what happened, whether they found Earth in her lifetime or were forced to settle another planet, or worse, were defeated by the Cylons, she had something to hold onto.

And as always, time would heal all wounds.

"When Noah is living with you can I come over and spend the night cycle?" Boxey's question interrupted her thoughts.

"Of course!" Athena smiled at her nephew and drew him closer. "You can have slumbers like Zac and I used to do."

"Will you take us to the Rejuvenation Center so I can teach Noah my favorite games?" Boxey asked with a mischievous grin.

"Oh boy, I'd better watch my supply of mushies closely if you're going to teach him how to hustle me," Athena chuckled.

"You don't get enough mushies for us both to win," Boxey wisely pointed out.

Athena rolled her eyes. Starbuck had created a monster and now there were going to be two trying to scam the other warriors. Athena hoped they gave Starbuck some of his own.

"Muffy, Noah is going is my new cousin. He's going to play with us," Boxey told his pet. Muffy let out a bark as if he understood his master's instruction. For all Athena knew he really did.

Athena's nerves began to jangle as the shuttle landed. She had brought Boxey along in order try and make Noah more comfortable, but she was still worried about how the other children were going to feel about her singling Noah out to "take home" with her. More than anything she didn't want to make any of the children feel jealous and she had no intention to cutting herself or Noah off from spending time with them. She just hoped they were still welcome.

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"Blasi ordered me to invite Athena to dinner with us," Starbuck said over the comm to his wingmate.

"How did that come up?" Apollo asked with a smile.

"It didn't really. She just mentioned it in passing when I was leaving earlier today," Starbuck told his wingmate. "She said she wanted to meet the Commander's daughter and meet her new son."

"So are you going to?" Apollo prodded.

"I'll ask, but do you think she'll come?" Starbuck wondered out loud.

"You won't know until you ask," Apollo was glad he didn't have to suppress the grin on his face. He probably shouldn't be enjoying this so much, but he was. He had never seen Starbuck so uncertain and hesitant about a woman. When Cassi had run off to Cain he had been confused and angry, but he hadn't acted like a shy kid. Starbuck hadn't even acted this way when he was a kid!

"I don't think she wants to have anything to do with me," Starbuck grumbled. "She practically threw me out last night cycle."

"She just needs time," Apollo said reassuringly.

"I'm not sure she'll ever trust me again. I can't blame her really," Starbuck sighed. "Not after all the times I let her down."

"That sounds suspiciously like you're giving up," Apollo said.

Starbuck was silent for a couple of centons as he sorted out his thoughts. "If I give up...I can't give up. And I can't give her time Apollo, if I step back now she'll never trust me. I guess I just have to keep at it until she's satisfied I'm sincere. I can't believe I'm saying this!"

"I can hardly believe it myself," Apollo agreed, he could practically see Starbuck throwing up his hands in frustration. This was definitely too fun..

"You do believe me, don't you?" Starbuck sounded insecure to Apollo's ears. "I mean it this time. I love her Apollo. I'm not going to give up! I need her. I don't know that I can live without her. I tried that, she made me...I can't Apollo. I won't."

"I believe you Starbuck," Apollo assured his friend. 'And if you don't _I'll_ shoot you myself!'

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"It'll be all right," Caphis squeezed Athena's hand.

"It's going to break my heart to see their faces," Athena whispered to Caphis, cognizant of Boxey walking just ahead of them.

"Some of the children will be upset, but most are genuinely happy for Noah. There's not much else we can do but help them work through their feelings," Caphis said gravely.

"They've experienced so much loss so young," Athena sighed. She knew Caphis was right, but she wanted nothing more than to turn tail and run from this necessary task.

"Omega says there's a room near your and Apollo's that's available," Caphis changed the subject to take Athena's mind off her worry.

"Really," Athena looked sideways at her friend. "Are you planning to take it?"

"Yeah, we are," Caphis told her. "But we're going to wait a bit longer to give the children some time to adjust to Noah leaving before I move too."

"You'll continue to work here won't you?" Athena asked.

"Of course, but like you said, there are other people who can be here during the cycles that Omega isn't on duty. We'll work it out. Sometimes we may stay here," Caphis told her.

"I'm really happy for you," Athena said sincerely.

"Me too. I owe it all to you, you know. Neither of us probably would have sought the other out if you hadn't provided an excuse," Caphis told her. "We're grateful to you for that."

"Nonsense. I'm sure one of you would have come to your senses eventually. If not, I would have wormed the information out of Omega at some point and brought him here by laser point if I had to," Athena elbowed him.

"That I could imagine. You're a brave woman. You can do this," Caphis said confidently as they reached to door to the children's play center.

"Come on Aunt Athena," Boxey urged as he fairly hopped around the hesitant adults. Muffy barked his concurrence.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Athena smiled at her nephew's simple excitement. Children knew better than to worry about "ifs" she realized. It was a philosophy she decided to regain starting that micron. "Let's go fetch your cousin."

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"Are you ready?" Athena looked around Noah's sleeping area one more time.

"Yup," Noah nodded.

"Great!" Boxey nodded and looked impatiently at the door. He couldn't wait to get back to the Galactica and begin to show Noah around his turf.

"Guess we're ready to go," Athena could almost see the mischief that Boxey was planning in that wily brain of his. He was a lot like his Uncle Zac at that age. Or like his Aunt Athena, for that matter, she admitted. "Let's go say goodbye."

Noah nodded, his earlier anticipation suddenly muted. Athena could see he hadn't given much thought to leaving behind what to him had been his home and family. She knelt down in front of him and placed her hand on his cheek.

"I know this will be difficult, but I promise you that we will come and visit your friends. You have gained a new family and a new home, but you haven't lost this one," Athena said gently. "I know it's scary, I'm scared too."

"You are?" Noah's eyes widened at the idea that an adult was scared.

"All the time," Athena laughed. "I want everything to be perfect for you and I don't want you or our friends to feel bad that you're leaving. So yeah, I'm scared too. But you know what, I'm going to try to be more like Boxey and not worry so much. How about you do the same?"

"Like me?" Boxey asked in surprise.

"I want to be like Boxey," Noah nodded.

Athena was pleased with her first attempt as a mother when she saw the smiles on both Noah and Boxey's faces. Of course, there still were the goodbyes that she wasn't looking forward to.

"You ready?" Caphis entered the room.

"As we'll ever be," Athena stood up and Noah slipped his hand into hers. On her other shoulder she balanced the bag of Noah's belongings.

"Everyone, Athena is here to take Noah to the Galactica. Don't we have something to say to them?" Rette asked the children as Noah, Athena, Caphis and Boxey entered.

As she finished speaking the children broke out into an old Colonial standard sang when warriors were going off to battle or people were otherwise moving away. Some of the children held handmade signs saying goodbye.

Athena felt a few tears fill her eyes as she listened to the young voices singing about goodbye and hopes to see you again. Such a sad theme for ones so young, but one they had all experienced in their short lives.

"Good luck Noah!" the children said at the end of the song. "We'll miss you." As soon as they were done the children broke from their temporary order and surrounded their departing friend.

This definitely was not the scene she had been expecting, but the other children seemed genuinely happy for Noah. She looked at Rette, her awe clearly written on her features.

"They're good children," Rette smiled proudly.

Athena agreed that she had every reason to be proud of this group of children. And here Athena was worried about raising one little boy!

"Can they come visit me on the Galactica?" Noah asked Athena, the other children looking on eagerly.

"I'm sure that something could be arranged," Athena assured them. A chorus of "wow" and "cool" filled the room in response.

"This is a good thing you're doing," Rette squeezed Athena's hand.

"I was just going to say that to you," Athena shook her head. "You raise these children as if they are your own and you hope that they find homes away from you. That must be so hard."

"If you love something you set if free to find its own happiness," Rette repeated the age old adage.

"I don't think I ever had faith in that one," Athena acknowledged, her thoughts briefly touched upon Starbuck.

"It's true. It's not until you set him free and that he chooses to come back to you that you can know if he really loves you," Rette said perceptively realizing that Athena wasn't talking about the orphans anymore.

'What about when someone else sets them free and they come to you?' Athena thought ironically.

"Aunt Athena, we're going to miss the shuttle," Boxey tugged on Athena's skirt to get her attention.

Athena moved forward at her nephew's prompting and proceeded to hug the children good bye on her own account. "Thank you for the lovely song. We'll see you in a couple of days at my usual time," she promised. As she spoke Noah joined Boxey at the door. Athena turned and moved to follow them.

"It's time to go home," she said to herself, her heart full of the promise of the future as she watched the boys amble down the hall with their arms around each other's shoulders. Well, at least Noah was trying to reach Boxey's shoulders.

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"This is truly a family dinner tonight," Adama stood at the head of the table with his cup of ambrosa held in the air. "I can't tell you how joyful I am to see so many new members of our family in my quarters this cycle, and one old member who is taking on a new role," he said specially for Sheba. "For this reason I send a special thank you for God and the Lords of Kobol."

Adama's words were not an exaggeration. Sitting around the new, larger table were his children Apollo and Athena and his surrogate children Boomer, Starbuck and Sheba. Then there was his grandson Boxey and next to Boxey was his new grandson Noah. Then next to Starbuck was his newly found father Chameleon and Siress Blasi whom Adama presumed was soon to be Starbuck's new step-mother. To make the evening more special their close friends Boomer, Jolly and Tigh were all free from duty at the same time, or at least Tigh for a little while.

After everyone took their celebratory sip of ambrosa the table erupted into chatter. Adama sat back in his seat and silently observed. There had been precious few moments since the Destruction that had filled him with such joy and peace. In fact, he could count them all on one hand. Only one before this had not been the end of some tragedy such as when Apollo or Starbuck miraculously returned to the fleet alive, that had been Apollo's marriage to Serena.

Yet, even that time had been surrounded by negative forces, Adama realized. They had believed never to see Starbuck alive again, they were traveling in a dark void towards what he hoped was Kobol, the Destruction was fresh in their minds and shortly thereafter they had found Starbuck alive only to lose Serena.

No, Adama decided. This was the only truly contented time Adama could remember since Ila and Zac had become unreachable to them.

And like Apollo, Adama couldn't help but be amused by the Starbuck's obvious but fruitless attempts to gain Athena's attention. Apparently Adama and Apollo weren't alone in their observations, Adama realized as he caught Chameleon's curious look between his son and Athena. Then Chameleon looked at the Commander, silently asking if he knew what was going on.

Boy did Adama have stories for Chameleon about his son, Adama actually rubbed his hands together.

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"You realize that if we have more children Apollo we're going to need a larger room," Sheba's eyes sparkled as she slipped her hand into her fiancee's under the table.

"I don't think Father would complain, neither would I?" Apollo whispered into her ear. He was immensely pleased to feel Sheba shiver as his breath hit her ear.

"You're a bad boy," Sheba said huskily.

"I can be even badder, especially if you keep talking about having more children," Apollo warned.

"Remind me of that later," Sheba sighed happily.

"You can be sure of that. So when are we going to have these children, or more specifically, when are we going to be sealed?" Apollo cleared his throat.

"I would like to have a holiday after," Sheba looked at Apollo questioningly.

"As would I," he nodded in agreement. "So what you're saying is that we both need to have free schedules. Boxey can stay with Athena I'm certain."

"And you _are_ the commander of the Blue Squadron...," Sheba hinted broadly.

"And I make the schedules," Apollo looked at his father guiltily. His father always made it a rule not to abuse power or engage in nepotism, but this was his sealing...

"I'm sure Adama won't mind us making sealing plans," Sheba was amused. He had loosened up considerably since she had come aboard, but sometimes he was so stuffy! She had to admire it though, she knew what a strong will it must have taken for him to be so unaffected by yahrens of friendship with Starbuck. Actually, it made his stuffiness endearing.

Apollo was watching the expressions cross her face and Sheba had a feeling he knew _exactly_ what she was thinking.

"Imagine how stuffy I might have been," he said, confirming her suspicion.

"I'd still love you," she promised, gazing into his eyes.

"You'll never have to prove that," Apollo chuckled.

"I was trying to be romantic and you're laughing," Sheba tossed her hair with feigned indignation. "We'll see if we talk about children tonight."

"You know, that might be a handy euphemism someday," Apollo pointed out.

"And I think you're stuffy," Sheba winked at him.

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"I thought you and Athena were long over," Chameleon commented to his son.

"Not if I have anything to say about it," Starbuck frowned as he watched Athena. She was so engrossed in Noah and Boxey that she hadn't noticed any of his attempts to gain her attention. Or she was ignoring him on purpose.

"What about Cassiopeia?" Chameleon asked quietly.

"Now, Chame, he's told you that the relationship is over," Siress Blasi put a hand over Chameleon's and looked apologetically at Starbuck.

"It's all my fault," Chameleon sighed.

Starbuck suddenly understood what Apollo meant all these years about parents! "Chameleon, it's not your fault it's mine and hers. It has nothing to do with you," Starbuck said patiently.

"If I hadn't asked her to lie," Chameleon shook his head.

"It's not that simple. We might have been able to work through all that, it was other things that drove us apart. I wish you would believe me," Starbuck said earnestly. "She and I, Cassi and I aren't meant to be together."

"Are you thinking of getting back together with Athena?" Blasi interjected a question of her own.

"She won't give me the time of day," Starbuck said in frustration.

"Why not?" Chameleon asked in surprise.

"It's his reputation dear and their history," Blasi explained.

"Hmm, I could see how that might be a problem," Chameleon nodded absently.

"She doubts your sincerity," Blasi explained the problem with that simple sentence.

"She told me she loved me, but she just said that to try and get over it and she won't give me another chance," Starbuck admitted as he watched the woman in question engaging in an animated conversation with Boomer and Jolly.

"Sounds like you need a system," Chameleon said decisively.

"This isn't gambling Chame. Do you love her? Really and truly? Or are you just thinking she's convenient?" Blasi asked.

"Even you think that," Starbuck waved a hand in frustration.

"It is you reputation my boy," Chameleon reminded his son. "What you need to do is change your reputation and convince her of your sincerity."

"Assuming you are sincere? It looks to me like Athena is no longer free to play around," Blasi said pointedly as she motioned towards Athena's son as she continued to press her point home.

"A system, that's all he needs, don't doubt me Blasi, the man needs a system. It's just like cards. Have faith," Chameleon silenced all objections as he set his mind to work.

Starbuck and Blasi just looked at each other silently, wondering what insane plan this new addition to their lives would come up with. Neither mentioning the fact that Chameleon had yet to devise a fool proof system at cards, even after dozens of yahrens of trying.

<><><><><><><><><><>

"So now that you're a mother are you thinking about finding a husband?" Jolly asked Athena with a grin on his face.

"What, are you volunteering? I doubt Lila would be happy to hear that," Boomer teased.

"No, uh, I wasn't," Jolly looked from Boomer to Athena and back, panic clearly etched on his face.

"Give your wingmate a break, I know you weren't thinking of stepping out on Lila," Athena gave Boomer a quelling look. "I haven't even spent one day as a mother, I'm hardly ready to think about my love life. From what my friends who old hands at being mothers tell me I won't have time to even think about it in the near future."

"That seems like a waste," Jolly said sadly, under the table he kicked his wingmate in a the shins to prevent another comment from that quarter.

Athena smothered a laugh and pretended to not have noticed.

"Noah and I can find you a husband," Boxey offered.

"Uh, thanks Boxey, but I think Noah and I would prefer to go it alone for a while," Athena tried to suppress a giggle that was bubbling beneath the surface. She could only imagine what candidates the two children would come up with.

"I think that might be a worthwhile project," Boomer was clearly in the mood to tease his friend unmercifully. "I could help you."

"What project?" Apollo having overheard his friend turned their way and asked.

"Finding Athena a husband," his son answered.

"A project?" Sheba sounded amused.

Athena closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She wasn't sure whether she should be mortified and amused, but if Starbuck _dared_ put in his cubit's worth she would have to kill him.

"Back in my youth it was common practice in my community for a girl's family to find her a husband," Siress Blasi said with an evil-looking grin on her face.

"I would be more than happy to choose a husband for you," Commander Adama interjected his offer into the conversation.

"We can be a council!" Boxey said excitedly.

"Council of Twelve," Athena muttered under her breath, when she looked up she found Starbuck's blue eyes intently studying her. A flush spread over her face as she became unable to draw herself to look away from him. She was surprised to see that Starbuck didn't seem to be harboring a compulsion to enter into the conversation and offer his assistance or suggestions. From the look in his eyes, however, she knew without a doubt that it wasn't because he didn't care about the topic.

"We should elect a leader," Boomer proposed.

"It should definitely be Noah since he'll have to live with whomever we pick for her," Apollo grinned at his sister.

"Do I get any say in this process?" Athena inquired sweetly.

"Do you think she should have any say Noah?" Sheba asked.

"I dunno," Noah looked at Athena hesitantly.

"It's okay, we always tease each other," Athena leaned over and let Noah know that she wouldn't be upset by his participation in the usual family banter. "You'll get used to it, then they'll tease you too."

"Really?" Noah whispered, his eyes wide.

"If you can take it," Athena chuckled and smoothed his straight blond hair.

"She can give...input, but she has to seal with whomever we pick," Noah delivered his decisive first decision as leader of the council to seal off Athena.

Athena looked up and found Starbuck still looking at her intently.

<><><><><><><><><><>

"So how do you like your new room?" Athena asked Noah as she sat down on the side of his bed.

"I can see the stars," Noah was still awed by this new feature in his life. Athena hoped it would be enough to take his mind off sleeping alone for the first time since fleeing the Colonies. Briefly she wondered whether she should have invited Boxey to spend the cycle, but she had wanted Noah to get used to that right off.

"Athena?" Noah said, again, impatiently as he tugged in her sleeve.

"I'm sorry Noah," Athena apologized sheepishly. 'I'd better remember this before I scold Noah for drifting off while I'm speaking to him!' Athena remembered a common complaint of her own mother when they were growing up. "You were saying?"

"Will you stay with me?" Noah asked in a quiet voice.

'So much for distraction,' Athena thought, even as her throat tightened at his request. Would _her_ presence make him feel safe or was she the only option? She scolded herself for her self-centered thoughts, but that didn't make her insecurity dissipate as she tenderly climbed into the bed and settled with her arm over Noah's small form.

<><><><><><><><><><>

"So are you a member of the council?" Apollo asked Starbuck as he entered the barracks after leaving Sheba at the women's barracks.

"What council?" Starbuck asked around the fumarello in his mouth.

Boomer let out a snort from the other side of the pyramid table.

"Your sister is suspicious enough of me as it is, you can't think I'd be...why am I answering you?" Starbuck scowled and tossed away his cards.

"I don't think Boxey and Noah were kidding," Jolly looked from one warrior to the other.

"What are you all talking about?" Bojay asked.

"Boxey and Noah started a council to find Athena a husband," Boomer informed them.

"Where can candidates sign up?" Greenbean asked.

"Noah is the leader of the effort, you might try to brown nose him," Starbuck suggested in a testy voice.

"What's wrong Starbuck, afraid of the competition?" Boomer teased.

"Oh, Starbuck wants her, forget it," Greenbean said in disappointment.

"I don't believe this conversation. Leave the boy alone. Are you going to play?" Starbuck asked the warriors sitting around the table.

"Testy, testy," Boomer shrugged and picked up his new hand.

Apollo took a seat and waited for the next round. He had a big grin on his face.

<><><><><><><><><><>

[Athena's Quarters]

"You need to have the most perfect dress," Athena told Sheba, her eyes bright with the prospect of designing something spectacular. It wasn't, after all, something she got to do much anymore.

"What did Serina wear?" Sheba asked quietly.

Athena's smile faded at the question.

"I just mean I don't want to wear anything similar," Sheba looked away. Despite Apollo assurances, she couldn't help but feel a bit of disappointment that this wouldn't be Apollo first sealing ceremony.

"No, you have every right to ask. I just, I don't know how to make you feel better about this. You have..." Athena sighed. She felt if she said what she felt that she would be betraying her sister Serina. Suddenly a smile lit her face. She had two brothers growing up, now she would have two sisters. "Do you really want me to describe the dress to you or do you want me to promise to create something completely different, completely you? Because I promise you Sheba, you are a very different woman than Serina. The only things you have in common are that you are strong, intelligent woman that I happen to love and who love my brother. In temperament and independence, let's just say you could never wear anything like she did."

"They shared an almost mythical wedding complete with lost worlds and frothy creations. Yours will be the real deal," Athena bit her lip and grasped Sheba's hand. She hoped her future sister understood her intentions and wasn't hurt by the mention of Serina and Apollo's wedding.

"Frothy dress? No, don't tell me about it. I don't think I could handle it now. I don't know why I'm feeling so insecure," Sheba's face was a mask of frustration. "This is just..."

"One of the most important things you've ever done in your life?" Athena said lightly.

"There is that aspect," Sheba laughed in relief. "Let go take a look at that material."

"You won't be disappointed, I promise," Athena linked her arm with Sheba's as they headed for the door.

"You should take a look for yourself since your son and mine plan to find you a husband soon," Sheba suggested.

"Yeah, I'll do that," Athena groaned.

<><><><><><><><><><>
[2 Sectons Later]

"Noah invited Caphis and I to join his council," Omega informed Athena as she stood behind him on the war bridge waiting for Colonel Tigh.

"I think this might be getting out of hand," Athena grimaced.

"Why do you say that? Because Noah invited a 'candidate' over to your quarters a few days ago?" Omega chuckled, thoroughly enjoying the advantages of being a neighbor.

"That might have something to do with it. I thought it was just harmless fun, but now I'm not so sure. I think maybe Noah really wants to have a father," Athena said as she made some last micron calculations on her hand held. "Try this permutation, I bet it will expand the new scanner's range."

Omega looked at the mini-screen Athena held in front of him as he made the suggested modifications. After a few microns a smile spread across his face. "Good job! We're not quite needing to get rid of long range patrols yet, this will make them a lot safer."

"Yes, good job Athena," Colonel Tigh had come up behind them as they exulted in their success.

"Hi Sir," Athena pulled back and assumed something akin to military posture.

"Shouldn't you be off duty Lieutenant?" Tigh asked his assistant.

"Yes, Sir, but Noah is staying with Boxey this cycle and I wanted to finish these calculations. And give you this," Athena handed Tigh a disk.

"What's this?" Tigh asked.

"Summary of the reports from the mission of planet G3587," Athena referred to the small mission of scientists that had spent a few days studying a seemingly habitable planet the secton before. "They believe they found some materials that will be useful in building new vipers."

"That is interesting," Tigh was clearly cheered by the news. "You seem to be working yourself a little thin lately?"

"Sir?" Athena looked uncomfortable by the question.

"Why don't you go to your quarters and get some sleep," Tigh's words were obviously an order.

"Yes, Sir," Athena turned to go.

"I know you have a lot of time on your hands now that Noah and Boxey are running your love life, but don't forget to have a little fun yourself," Tigh teased as Athena reached the last step.

Athena didn't bother to respond, but her lack of amusement was clearly etched on her face as she left the bridge. She was so engrossed in her thoughts that she didn't notice a warrior coming around the corner and she plowed right into him.

"Whoa!" Starbuck grabbed Athena's arms to steady her

"Starbuck!" Athena exclaimed in surprise. "Sorry, I didn't see you."

"So I noticed, otherwise you might have headed the other way like you usually do these days," Starbuck's grip tightened.

"I haven't been avoiding you...exactly," Athena amended at Starbuck's doubtful expression. A flush spread over her face at having been caught being so cowardly. "How are you?" she changed the subject.

"How am I?" Starbuck queried. "Relating to what?"

Athena suddenly became conscious that they were engaged in their confrontation right outside the bridge. Despite the late centar they wouldn't be alone for long.

"If you're uncomfortable we can go to your quarters?" Starbuck suggested.

"No, um, fine," Athena straightened her shoulders. She wasn't afraid of him!

"Let's go," Starbuck let go of her arms and clasped her right hand in his left. He wasn't going to let her escape now that he had finally gotten her alone. She had been avoiding him for two sectons. He knew that she was busy with being a new mother and with her work, but she also wasn't responding to any of his messages. He was seriously considering lobbying Boxey and Noah to consider him a candidate and setting up a blind date with her so that he could talk to her!

A few centons later they entered her dark quarters. Starbuck still held tightly onto her hand. Athena hadn't pulled away for the entire walk there he observed and was encouraged by it.

"Athena?" Starbuck pulled Athena towards him. "Have you given any thought to what I told you?"

"What did you tell me?" Athena couldn't hide how affected she was by his closeness, but tried anyway by pretending to be searching for something on the blank walls of the dark room.

"Do you want me to say it again?" Starbuck touched the tips of his fingers against her cheek as he pressed their entwined hands to his hip.

"Say what?" Athena asked shakily.

"That I love you. That I've missed you," Starbuck said sincerely, his blue eyes burning into hers.

Athena swallowed and her breathing sped up. Starbuck could feel her trembling just a few centimeters away from his body.

"Have you missed me?" he pressed on despite her lack of vocal response.

"Yes," Athena whispered. Her head was whirling. She wasn't prepared for this and now she couldn't bring herself to pull away from him or deny him the truth. She _had_ missed him. She did still love him. Despite all the logic and experience she wanted nothing more than to be in his arms again. As she admitted the last fact to herself she circled his hip with her fingers and her body was drawn to press against his. Her other hand slid around his collar and entwined itself in his hair.

For endless centars they kissed each other and ran their hands over the other's bodies as they tried to make up for lost time. Movement for movement they matched each other and challenged each other.

Athena could feel tears gathering behind her eyes as she reveled in his long missed touch. 'This is why,' she told herself. No matter what happened between them over the yahrens, when they were alone and in each other's arms she never doubted the depths of his feelings. She never doubted that she was the one that his soul called out to or that she was the one that he craved.

Starbuck unclasped Athena's uniform top uncovering her the front of her shoulders and chest then he slid his soft, moist lips down her throat leaving sparks of sensation in their path and the anticipation of his touch ahead of them. Athena cradled his head in her hands urging him on.

When he reached the crest of her breast he paused teasingly. Athena moaned and tried to press him. Satisfied Starbuck took the aching bud into his mouth.

"Oh," Athena moaned as his hot tongue laved the aching point over and over and stabs of desire shot up her body.

Suddenly Starbuck pulled back. From his heavy breathing Athena could see that it wasn't a lack of desire that drove his actions. Fighting back the haze that had surrounded her senses she looked at him, too curious to be insulted.

Starbuck was careful not to let Athena out of his arms. He was fully cognizant that one wrong move would push her further away from him. "I'm sorry that wasn't what I came here to do. Not that I didn't enjoy it," Starbuck broke off uncertainly as Athena looked down and he could no longer read the expression in her eyes. Was she mad at him? Had he blown it?

"Then why did you come here?" she gently disentangled herself from his embrace. He let her go and watched as she refastened her uniform and smoothed her hair. More to keep herself busy than repair her appearance he could tell.

At least she hadn't thrown him out. Yet.

"I...I missed you. I had to see you. I had to know why you've been avoiding me," Starbuck fumbled for words. He was beginning to tire of the uncharacteristic insecurity this entire situation was bringing out in him.

"I haven't been avoiding you Starbuck," Athena denied quietly.

"Then why haven't you answered my messages?" he asked snappishly.

"I've tried. I've punched up your message account, but I found it ridiculous to leave you a message. So then you'll leave me a message back...we're on the same ship. Can you tink of a time over the past couple of sectons that you haven't been on patrol when I've not been teaching or on the bridge? And I have a son now," Athena reminded him.

Starbuck let out a breath and sat down on and dropped his face into his hands. "I can't handle this Athena, you're driving me crazy," his voice was muffled.

"How have _I_ been driving _you_ crazy?" Athena couldn't hide her amusement at the interesting role reversal.

"Fine, laugh at me," Starbuck lifted his head and looked at her sulkily, in other words employing his favorite technique.

"I'm raising a five yahren old and I don't know who's more mature. Yes, I do. Noah is," Athena teased. Amused by his antics, but refusing to let him get away with flashing his gorgeous face at her to get out of an important conversation.

"What's going on here Athena?" Starbuck searched her face. She wasn't angry with him and she wasn't throwing him out of her quarters or hiding behind a stoic facade. Something had obviously changed. He just wasn't sure if it was in his favor or not. "Do you still love me?" he threw caution to the stars and asked.

"Yeah, I do," Athena couldn't resist reaching up and brushing Starbuck's hair out of his eyes. "You need to cut your hair," she said lightly.

"I already have a Captain who tells me these things. What's going on here?" Starbuck captured her hand and for once forced an issue he had spent yahrens avoiding.

"I've missed you too. And I do love you. No matter how crazy I know that is after everything we've been through together. I'm not afraid of you anymore," Athena smiled.

"Why were you afraid of me? No, don't answer that I don't think I want to hear all that again," Starbuck waved his hand. He knew very well what Athena always had to fear from him - that he would back off as soon as they got close. "So what now?"

"You're asking me? Maybe that's why I'm sitting here, why _you're_ sitting here. You never used to ask me anything. I'd really like to try and make us work Starbuck," Athena told him.

"I sense a 'but' somewhere in there," Starbuck's heart still sped up hopefully anyway.

"But, I have a son now. A son whom I suspect really wants a father and who I know idolizes you. This, us, can't affect him. If you and I don't work out I don't want him to be hurt by it," Athena told him.

"So how do we do that?" Starbuck asked.

"I'm not sure. We take things slow, we don't let him find out that we're romantically involved. Otherwise he might make you get sealed to me," Athena chuckled.

"I knew I would be the perfect candidate for his search," Starbuck teased before his expression turned serious again. "I don't want to hurt him either. I'll do whatever you think is best. What's slow by the way?"

"A nice comfortable pace. Something that won't spook you and something you can still walk away from without causing too much damage," Athena explained with a shrug. Suddenly she looked away from him, unable to stop herself from wondering whether she was doing the right thing. It was different now. She wouldn't be the only person getting hurt this time. She had a little boy to consider, not just some uncomfortable awkwardness of the adults in her family to consider.

"I'm not going to get spooked or walk away. I mean it this time," Starbuck said earnestly and pulled her hands onto his lap.

"I can't take that chance with my son. Have you thought about this?" Athena asked, putting her faith in his answer. "I'm a mother now. I won't be available at a micron's notice for a pyramid game or to go to the Officer's Club or anywhere else for that matter. Things are different now for us. If we get involved things will be more...adult."

"First of all, we are involved whether we make it official or not. Second, there's nothing to think about. I love you and I love Noah already. Thirdly, we'll make it work this time. Besides, I have this wingmate who owes my girlfriend a lot of child care since she's always looking after his son. And who knows, maybe I can find something to do that includes children," Starbuck leaned in to resume their kiss.

"No corrupting my son Starbuck, I mean it!" Athena pulled away from his attempt to kiss her and said threateningly.

"Who me?" Starbuck asked innocently before pressing his lips against hers.

<><><><><><><><><><>
[3 days later]

"You don't have to do this," Athena stood halfway to the door of her quarters looking from the door to Starbuck and back.

"Athena, it'll be fine. I'm not completely without responsibility," Starbuck put his arm on her bare back and walked her towards the door. "If your son wasn't here I wouldn't let you leave dressed like that. Now, isn't that responsible?" he whispered in her ear. She wore a pair of pants and a top that bared both her midriff and her back. He wasn't sure how it stayed up, all he knew is that it had better while she on the Rising Star and he was back on the Galactica looking after Noah while she and girls celebrated Sheba's impending sealing.

"If you need anything, call my father. You know he would be more than happy to have Noah stay with him this cycle," Athena didn't look convinced of Starbuck's abilities to watch her son by himself.

"I'm a warrior and you really think I can't look after a small child?" Starbuck mocked her doubts.

"You are a small child," Athena told him.

"Then we'll get along great," Starbuck assured her.

"My brother lives just next door and so does Caphis and Omega," Athena needlessly reminded him.

"Stop worrying, Noah will be fine," Starbuck firmly pushed her out the door.

"It's not Noah I'm worried about," Athena could be heard saying as the door closed.

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